Dancing in the throes of the inner feminine and masculine energies has been an ongoing, unknown, imbalance for me for decades. My guess is it’s been the same for most of humanity, at least in developed countries. This culture has been disconnected from our deeper relationship to the earth, the cosmos, moon, stars, sun, and Soul.
As far back as most of us can remember and beyond, we’ve lived in a world that strongly leans toward the masculine qualities, negates the feminine qualities. They have served a significant purpose in our evolutionary process. They have been both constructive and yet highly destructive. From the distortions we’ve been conditioned in ways that have negated vital aspects of our full person-hood, which in turn distorts our connections to all of Life and one another.
For decades I’d move in and out of these realms of the Sacred Feminine. Mostly touching in briefly enough to take a big sigh, let go of the armor, only to quickly thrust myself (or be thrusted it felt) back into my distorted, wounded masculine for extended periods of time. What I can say for myself, is that it has been an exhausting dance, disheartening at many junctures and frustrating and deeply sorrowful when I could feel the inner cries of my own soft preciousness feeling trapped in some deep dungeon.
The stories running though my head, body, and heart dating back for so long that told me ‘not to be so needy,’ ‘to pull myself up by my bootstraps,’ ‘don’t be so sensitive,’ ‘don’t cry without a reason,’ ‘to be tough so I could survive in the world.’ From these beliefs held in every fiber and cell of this being, I lived a life which felt sharp, being told by some I was harsh, and in constant striving to be in the know and wanting the higher states of consciousness, out of this body. This energy left me depleted, feeling judgment and intolerant of those who I saw as weak or prissy or needy. I hadn’t realized in the throes of this conditioning how far I was from the expansive depths of Soul Presencing and Love, both personal and unconditional.
Maybe you too can relate?
Over the last 4 years I’ve been alchemized back into a more vital and healthy balance through the living teaching initiations of Inner Alchemy/Inner Marriage. This journey away from a more masculine bent has led me out of the chains of a hardening of heart, that truly just sought protection. I’ve released the belief that my worth is garnered through productivity and that I know myself only from how busy I can be. I’ve reclaimed my emotional being whom I invite to be sensitive, soft, feel all my feels, be vulnerable, ask for help, to have needs, and know it’s ok to deeply rest in not-knowing.
My spirituality too, for over a decade had taken on more reclusive, out of the body, isolated, purist expressions. Though this leg of the journey served a purpose like all things do, eventually became apparent it was time for the next level learning. There was clear recognition of how I’d functioned in ways that negated the emotional, the relational, the heart-centered, ways of the feminine. I’d lost the sacred intimacy with my own soft underbelly and negated the need for deeper connections with others. This too has been reclaimed.
We’re seeing an emergence of the tender feminine qualities. Her Sacredness is being revealed through the availability to our own vulnerability. This isn’t about gender, this is about expressions and qualities of consciousness, frequencies of higher expressions.
There doesn’t need to be a separation from the fiery, warrior, wrathful feminine power that stands for truth or justice, but as I see it that power is still masculinized, because it is externalized. From my experience, I’ve seen the importance of surrendering to the power of vulnerability, accessing my feelings, recognizing I have needs, and that the more I connect to my deeper Soul Presencing, the less I need to prove through ‘knowing,’ ‘doing,’ or ‘productivity,’ or making loud claims of a power fueled by divisions.
Once I give space to my tenderness & vulnerability, and no longer in judgment or suppression of those qualities, then I can assess from clarity and discernment what power means to me, moment by moment. This is where I am empowered from within. and the balancing of my fiery feminine can stand on an inner ground of deeply connected power and dance with my inner masculine.
Many stories are being rewritten as to how we live in true connection of these innate qualities of consciousness which are our emotions, thoughts, embodied, Soul/Spirit selves. We are rising into divine beings that require a new reconfiguration, new blueprints of what higher expressions of Feminine and Masculine, where all warrior archetypal power can be emissaries of Love and Unity and the soft, preciousness is held tenderly.
Are your stories ready to be rewritten & rewired?
This is the New Earth that thrives in higher frequencies. We are being called. Love is tapping in our heart. Do you have the inner ears to hear? We are blooming a new way of Life.
This journey to embody our Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine blueprints are landing in many hearts who feel called and ready to walk this path. If you feel the Soul-call, the deep stirring of your Heart inviting you to reclaim your Wholy-Wholeness, please contact me! Let your inner journey begin!
In Loving Devotion ~
Lotus
Lotus Lindley 